Welcome to the Empowered Essence podcast where we liberate you and empower you to let your soul lead the way in life and business. I am your host, Laura Lawrence, sharing my thoughts and intimate conversations with featured guests on human design, energetics and spirituality to provide you with the tools you need to tap into your most authentic self. I am here to empower you to walk away feeling ready to live your most expansive and purposeful life.
Let's dive in. Hello everyone and welcome to this week's episode of Empowered Essence. This is a solo episode with myself and I just wanted to say how much I have loved this journey. This journey of creating podcasts has been so awesome and cool because it's been a creative outlet for me, something that I feel like I've been craving in my business, that I just didn't know the right avenue. I love posting on Instagram and doing lives and connecting with people, but this podcast is really just something that I can do myself on my own time and just share whatever is on my heart, whatever is on my mind. And as a projector, I think podcasts, the more that I do, these are really powerful tool for projectors because we can share our wisdom, share our knowledge and really just shine our light in a way that feels really good. And so far this has felt really, really good to be able to do this. So I hope you're enjoying the episode so far. I know I've been enjoying creating them and I hope that energy is felt with you. So as I was creating notes for this episode, this episode is really all about sharing my journey just so you guys can get to know me a little bit better, this person behind this podcast and this business. And I got a little emotional as I was writing these notes because my journey has not always been easy. Over these last few years especially, I've had to do a lot of soul searching, I've had to do a lot of decommissioning, I've had events that have occurred that have not been easy for me. But I know looking back on all of this, that it was all just bringing me to my highest self, it was all putting me on my highest path. And so I want you to know. And I hope that the takeaway out of all of this is that no matter how difficult things may feel or how dark they may feel at this particular point in time in your life or at any point in time in your life. To know that they will get better. That a lot of these events that occur in our lives are just course corrections oftentimes and helping us get to a realization or a point in our lives that are pointing us in the right direction of our highest path. Of our purpose. I truly believe through my learnings in Human Design, my belief in spirituality and just higher guidance and higher source to all of us that we all have a purpose, that we all have something to accomplish and achieve in this lifetime. So it was just really cool for me to reflect back on this journey over these last, I would say, four or five years, and how it's really brought me closer or aligned me with my highest path. So human design has not always been in my life. Human design is something that I have found along this journey, and I truly believe that we get introduced to human design at the right times in our lives, and we're not introduced to human design at a point in our lives before we're ready for it. So I think it's really important. So before I share my journey with human design, I think it's really important for me to share with you just my back story, who I am, how I came to be at this point in time. And in another episode, I'll share my journey specifically with human design. But today is just my story and how I've gotten to the point that I'm at right now. So I'm going to start back in 2017. So, the beginning of 2017, january of 2017. I was recently married to my now husband, and we are living downtown Toronto. I was working for a multinational financial services company, and I was reporting into a senior vice president who really believed in me, really saw this path for me, and it was the path that I thought I saw for myself as well at that time. So I went to business school. I have always known that I had an affinity for business. I loved business. And so I started my career in the corporate world right out of university. And so I worked for a company that I worked my way up the ladder. I was very well respected within that organization, and I had hopes of making it to senior vice president, CEO. That was the goal, that was the vibe for me. And today I still have the goal of being a CEO or not even a goal. I am a CEO right now. So I've always had this affinity for business, but I guess the type of business is a little bit different than what I saw for myself before. But at the time, back in 2017, I had everything that I wanted. I had the job, we were living downtown Toronto. We had this beautiful condo that overlooked Lake Ontario. I was going for drinks after work and networking, and I had a great group of friends. It literally was everything that I wanted. And we had just gotten married. Beautiful, beautiful wedding. It was just fairy tale perfect. But there was just something that was missing in my life. There was something that was niggling at me that I needed to make a change. And at the time, my husband, we were living downtown Toronto and my husband was commuting back to our hometown of Kitchener Waterloo, which is about for people who don't know the area, it's about an hour and ten minute drive outside of Toronto. But in traffic, in rush hour traffic, you're looking at two to 3 hours depending on the day. So his mental health and physical health just wasn't there. And so we knew we wanted to start a family and working downtown Toronto, living downtown Toronto we just didn't feel was conducive for our lifestyle or for what we envisioned for our family. Not to say that you can't raise a family in a city I definitely love and commend and think that families or parents who raise their families downtown are way cooler than me, but for us, it just wanted the same experience that we had as children, living in a suburb and having a backyard and having parks close by and those sorts of things. So anyways, we made the decision that we would move back to our hometown of Kitchen or Waterloo in 2017. In January of 2017. And within a matter of two months, I had gotten a new job. We bought a house. It was like, oh my gosh, the stars aligned and everything was working out. I was like, yes, we're on the right path. This is the right thing to do. However, the universe had other plans for us. And so once we got settled in, the next two years were less than perfect. I struggled to find my footing in the new role that I had within my corporate job. My job was something that I always look to for stability. It was always something that I was good at, it was always something that I excelled at. And when my job was not going the way that I expected or the way that I planned, I felt so off kilter. I just didn't feel like I had this path, this direction, this purpose. And I think that it's so important for a lot of people to point this out because a lot of people use their job as their sense of purpose, as their sense of direction in life. And I was that person. I remember my husband saying to me, well, what are your hobbies like? What do you enjoy doing in your spare time? And all I thought about was work. I was that overachiever, that perfectionist. I was climbing the corporate ladder. That was who I was. And so all I thought about was work. So when work went sideways for me, so to speak, I felt lost. I felt like I didn't have anything that I could grab onto. I felt like the ground was shaking underneath me and I couldn't find my balance. At the same time, we were trying to start a family and we were trying to get pregnant, and I did get pregnant, but after 13 weeks, we had lost the baby. And that was the point that I really was definitely the darkest point in my journey. Something that I thought was going to bring so much light in my life. It quickly became something that was very difficult for me. And at that point in time, I went into this deep state of depression because work wasn't going well. The thing that I was looking forward to so much was becoming a mother. And when that didn't happen, that was when I hit that rock bottom for myself. This was a point in my life that I was forced to surrender no matter what I did, what I tried to make myself feel better, to make myself feel like I had this grounding or this footing in my life. None of that worked. I did not have any control. And that was the very first time in my life that I realized that I did not have control and I could not control everything in my life. I was forced to surrender and it was the most difficult process for me. But that looking back was probably the most liberating part of my journey. That teaching. You couldn't tell me that I could not control everything in my life. No one could tell me that. I had to experience that. I had to feel that for myself to learn that lesson. And as a third line in human design, we have to experience things to really ground ourselves in those lessons, to really actually learn those lessons and embody those lessons. And so I had to go through that experience of not being able to control my job, not being able to control my pregnancy, not being able to control my emotions or feelings at the time, the hormonal impacts of it as well. At the time, I truly felt like I was broken and I was searching for all of these external things to fix me. Taking depression meds, going to therapy, all of these external things that were trying to fix the problem. But what it really was was I just needed to tune inward. I needed to start listening to myself and my own inner guidance. And I remember going to bed one night and I remember just saying, show me away. Show me a path. I didn't know who I was talking to or what I was saying, but I was like I am at this point where I'm so frustrated in the job that I had and I was so heartbroken by the negative pregnancy test after negative pregnancy tests that I just needed a new direction. That night I went to bed and overnight I had a dream. And a dream that I went into my boss's office and I asked for a different role. And this role was a more junior position, a more junior position than the position that I had, which to me was such a blow to the ego. And it was almost right away I had this visceral response of why would I ever do that? But you know what ended up happening? I ended up waking up that morning and just thinking to myself, you know what? What do I have to lose? I am so unhappy right now. I need a change in my life. I need a shift in my life, and I need to do this for myself. And so that day, I went into my boss's office, I told her that I wanted this other role or to be considered for this other role. And within a matter of two and a half months, I was in that role. And I had less stress, I had less worry, and I surrendered. I truly, truly surrendered to the process. About three weeks after I took that role, I got pregnant and I had my daughter nine and a half months after that. And that's really when my life began to blossom. And my life just began opening up, is when my daughter was born. The whole pregnancy journey was a big healing journey, but it just skyrocketed. It escalated, it blossomed when I was on maternity leave, because I finally got that time and space away from the everyday grind, the everyday hustle, to really start tapping into my inner guidance. I was so busy, I was working my job, I work late into the night. I was doing all sorts of things, and I was always doing, I was always on. And I never had that time and space to really connect in. And so this was the first time that I started to feel free, I started to feel spaciousness. And that is probably my biggest lesson out of this whole experience, regardless of what energy type you are. But giving yourself space, giving yourself freedom, giving yourself time, that is the biggest gift that you can give yourself. Just disconnection from the hustle and bustle the everyday life, that's when you start connecting in with your intuition. That's when you can start connecting in with your higher guidance versus being influenced by everyone that's around you. So over my maternity leave, that's when I really started exploring my own personal interests. Like I said back in 2017, Laura, I didn't have personal interests. I didn't have hobbies, I didn't have things that I just enjoyed doing on my time off. All I did was work. That was who I was, and that's how I defined myself. So I started exploring personal interests, and that included that spiritual realm. So learning about meditation, learning about the chakra system, starting self development and taking courses, listening to podcasts, they were all sources of expansion and development for me. And about four or five months into my maternity leave, I actually started a blog. And that was my first foray into sharing my voice and getting myself out there online. So I started a blog in January of 2020, and it was called Le Deer. And the idea of Le Deer was my daughter's name is Ellery, and we called her Ellie for a time period. It's funny, we don't actually call her Ellie anymore. We just always call her Elliery. But the blog was called Ellie Dear. And it was really these stories that I shared that I planned to share with my daughter when she got older, of all of these personal lessons that I've experienced in my life. And the idea was to empower her, but really for any woman to listen to it. And one of the very first blog posts that I did was, you can't control everything. And I shared my journey of pregnancy and the miscarriage and all of those sorts of things, and it was just beautiful. It was a beautiful, beautiful experience. And I loved sharing it, and I loved the feedback that I was getting from people. And I knew in my soul that there was something to this, that there was some sort of sharing my story and connecting with other women. And that's really when I started the fascination with the coaching world. And so a few months later, I joined a mastermind of women who were starting online businesses. And I met a lot of people in that Mastermind that I am still so connected with. Marsha van Weinsberg. Perfect example. Someone who's already been a guest on my podcast. I met her in that Mastermind. She was in it. And I was just so in awe of these women sharing their stories, sharing their passions. And it really got me into the idea of starting my own coaching practice. And so with my business background, working in corporate strategy, working in operations, business development, I had a really strong business background. And so I wanted to share that with Moms in particular, because I was on maternity leave. I wanted to start a business coaching practice for moms and share my wisdom, share my knowledge around marketing and sales and distribution and all of those sorts of things. And so by May of 2020, I had launched my very first group program and I had one person sign up. Me now is so grateful for that one person that signed up. But at the time, all I could think to myself was, you put in all of this time and effort and energy, and you only got one person signing up. That was my mindset. That was my mindset at the time. But that woman taught me so much because I went through with it. I worked with her. It taught me integrity. It taught me sticking to my word. And in the coaching world, they often say, what's worse than no one signing up one person? That's often something that they say in the coaching world. But for me, I had to I had to see what it was like working with someone because I hadn't had that coaching experience. And I'm so grateful because I had that experience. I had one paying client. She was the start of everything. And I am so grateful to this day for that one woman who believed in me, who saw that I had a gift, who saw that I had a passion for helping people. And so looking back, I'm so grateful. But at the time and so if you at all are ever in this situation where it's like only one person, thank that one person, thank that one person for believing in you and seeing in you the gifts that you have to offer this world. That fall, that year is when I started diving into Human Design. So I had scheduled a human design reading that fall with the lovely Carrie Russell. And if you don't know her, you need to follow her. She is just an incredibly fierce powerhouse in the human design space and I owe a lot to her in terms of how much I learned. And so I scheduled a Human Design reading with her and I was just blown away. I was blown away with how she read me like a book and all of a sudden, all of these light bulbs are clicking in terms of why my business felt hard, why I wasn't attracting women into my space, why I believed the things that I believed. And it's like all of these years of conditioning all started to boil up to the surface and I got to see these points in my life or these actions that I was taking that were just so misaligned to who I am. And I intuitively knew that, but I just didn't listen to it because I let the conditioning lead the way. I let other voices or other opinions mean more than what my own opinion of myself and my journey and my path meant. It was so validating and so freeing when I started diving into Human Design. So I took a course with Kerry, and then from there, I just started talking about Human Design on my social media. And within just a few weeks, actually, I had people reaching out to me saying that they wanted to book a human design reading with me, that they wanted to learn more, they wanted to learn more about themselves because they started to see how much I understood myself. And so that was just a huge sign for me that I was in total projector alignment because I was receiving these very aligned invitations. So May of 2021 is when I officially launched human Design Readings in my business. And I really relaunched my business, and it was the turning point for me. I started offering human design readings. I took my coaching certification. And since May of 2021, I have served over 100 beautiful souls in my readings, in my one to one coaching, as well as the course that I offer. And it just blows me away every single time that I think about that and I think about this journey of a point in my life where I just felt so lost, so purposeless. And today I feel this purpose just running through my veins every single day. And I am so proud of that girl who never gave up, that kept showing up and keeps showing up. I have such a huge, huge vision for this business. And, you know, the lessons that I have learned over these past few years is that those points of darkness in our lives are what give us our greatest strengths, what give us our greatest gifts in our lives. It opens up, it unravels, it breaks down, it crumbles the things that are no longer serving us in order to bring us on our highest path. And so the next time, or if you're even in this, if you're going through a really difficult time in your life or a time where you're like, questioning your path, know that these points in our lives are just getting us to open up, to see something bigger, to see something greater, to get us to think differently, to question, to ask for help. That is a big thing like asking for help. A lot of the times when we're on these dark spaces, there's pride, there's ego, there's all sorts of stories that are coming up about asking for help. But when you start asking for help, that's when your purview starts opening and you start seeing other perspectives. And it might not be hiring a coach at this particular point in time. It might be just listening to podcasts and getting free resources in order to start seeing things differently. But this whole deconditioning process and I feel like this is going to be a whole other episode of my own deconditioning process and my journey. Since understanding human design and doing my certification and all of that, I feel like I'm going to save all of that for another episode. But I just wanted you to have some context of who I am and how I've transformed it's. Interesting, I'm still this like a business driven person. I still love the idea of running and owning my own business, which is something that I've enjoyed since I was in high school. I've always loved business, but it's such a different path. I was always in this very structured corporate environment and now running a business in the spiritual world that is in the energetics world. And a lot of people that I know have said to me, laura, you're a completely different person. Some people have been thrown off by it. Some people have been like, Laura, this isn't you. And my response to that is, I am more me than I have ever been in my entire life. And so there are people that don't understand this journey that I'm on. And so if you're on this journey, it's okay. It is totally okay that they don't understand this journey that you're on. It is your journey. It is your path. What matters most is, do you love this journey? Do you love who you're becoming? Do you love what it is that you do every day and this vision that you have for yourself. I had this vision that I was going to lead women, that I had this vision that I was going to speak on stages, that I was going to change the world. And I had all of that back in probably 17 2018 time frame, but I didn't know any of that, how it would all come together, but I've just stayed the course and I've let my life, I've surrendered to these events that have just crumbled and shifted me in such beautiful ways. And so I hope you have the opportunity to have the gift of surrender, to have these experiences that unravel you, because they are beautiful, they are an unlocking, they are just this rise to your highest self, your highest path, and I can't wait to see you rise and to become that person that you are born to be. But I do want to share something else that's a really exciting coming up in my world. So I talked about this higher vision for my business and this next highest vision for my business is coming to the surface and it's coming to fruition. And so this next step in my evolution and in my journey, I've been serving beautiful clients. Like I said, I've served over 100 clients in the last year and a bit in human Design readings, one to one coaching my course. And I really feel so much purpose running through my veins as I do this. And I know this wisdom needs to be shared with more people. And so I am so excited to announce and to share that I will be having a Human Design certification launching this month. So in the month of September, I will be launching a Human Design certification for coaches, healers, intuitive and other online business owners. This has been such an incredible journey for myself in terms of understanding myself and the witnessing my clients go through this journey as well, in terms of understanding theirselves. It is complete and utter permission to be ourselves, to step into our individuality, and I want so many more people to experience and to learn this incredible, incredible, incredible wisdom. So my weightlist is open for this human Design certification. It will be a five month certification. There is so much interworkings to understand. But the idea of it is when you come out of this certification. You will have such confidence in understanding human design and learning to embody it in your own personal life. That you will be able to be confident in sharing that in terms of readings. Coaching. However. It is that you want to provide this modality in your business. In your life. To your clients. All of those things. And so I can't wait. So the waitlist is open now and the link will be in the show notes and so you can join the waitlist and there will be special discounts and offers to anyone that's on the waitlist. So you will get special things that are not actually released to the public when it goes live in mid September. So be sure to send me your email so that you are one of the first to know and also get in on the special offers that are going to be provided through it. Thank you so much for holding space in this story and journey that I just shared with you. Like I said, I got so emotional writing all of this down and seeing how far that I've come and I encourage you to do the same to write your path, to write your journey. Where did you start? Where are you now? Where do you want to go in your life? And if human design and doing this certification is part of your journey and this vision for yourself, I would love, love for you to jump in and join the Waitlist at this point in time. So thank you so much and we will talk next week. Have a great day.
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